Golden bits of Zombie Explosions

Unless you are living under a rock you know that the Oscars were on last night. All the fashionable people of Hollywood were out looking glamourous and praising one another. I didn’t watch the whole show, The Walking Dead was on (why are you so stupid Andrea!!!!!), but I kept flipping back to see how Seth McFarlane was doing. What I caught wasn’t too bad but it was mostly the same old clap-trap that you’d expect. Sadly I missed the Red Carpet runway and missed most of the fashion but I did get caught up with it this morning.

Like last year there wasn’t anyone there that looked “WTF bad” most of the looks were at the least acceptable I guess that is what happens when everyone realizes that stylists are important. I really liked

Halle Barry in Versace – She finally realized that you can cover up and look good

Jennifer Garner in Gucci – I mean this in a good way: her dress was a mullet, business in the front, party in the back. It just worked.

Stacy Keibler in Naeem Khan – She looks gloriously elegant

Charlize Theron in Christian Dior – Looked angelic in white

The people I took issue with were:

Salma Hayek in McQueen – Love the dress but the hair and makeup needed work

Kristen Stewart in Reem Acra – She had this beautiful dress but it didn’t fit right and she didn’t bother doing anything else with herself. And then what was up with her presentation? She looked drunk, or high, or she was in the middle of a heavy petting session before she got on stage. Ugh! Why won’t she go away?!

Helena Bonham Carter in Vivienne Westwood – Get the hair out of your eyes so you can better see what you are putting on

Quentin Tarantino in he-didn’t-care-why-should-we – Seriously. Care a little.

About the actual ceremony, what I saw was fine. I really liked Adele’s performance and she deserved to win; that dance number with Charlize Theron and Channing Tatum was fab-u-lous; Barbara Streisand did something to her face and I am not talking about her contorted singing face; and that number at the end of the show was cute.

Anyways, speaking about movies I got to see a couple recently, in an actual theater – I so missed that. Here are the short, condensed reviews.

This was a cute Zombie love story that was a lot of fun but did not quite deserve all the praise that it has been getting. It wasn’t bad in any way, it wasn’t impressive either, it was mediocre and apparently mediocrity is what is getting praise these days simply because there is so much crap out there. Everyone in the movie did their job; Teresa Palmer plays the love interest just fine; John Malkovich plays non-communicative angry dad just fine; Nicholas Hoult plays conflicted zombie teenager (?) well; but I gotta say that Rob Corrdry, who plays a zombie as well, who says about 10 lines manages to steal the show. His few words are delivered with perfect timing and they all get a laugh.

Warm Bodies is worth a watch. It has action bits, sad bits, funny bits, and gross bits, all the elements you need to like a film.

A good day to die hard

I am sorry to say this but, UGH!

Seriously just stop. Hollywood just seems to enjoy ruining things and I don’t like it. The last “new” Die Hard Movie, Live Free or Die Hard, wasn’t a Die Hard movie but at least it was a good action flick. Where as this still isn’t a Die Hard movie and the action sucks. The problem is that the choices the characters make, makes no sense. They are just doing these completely preposterous things for absolutely no reason destroying the idea of suspension of disbelief. You spend half the time thinking “what the hell did they do that for?!” making what occurs after just stupid and very explode-y. Plus all the swearing that wasn’t in the last film is in this one.

Don’t pay to see A Good Day to Die Hard, just wait for it to come on tv.


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1 Comment

Oscar the Grouch

Charlize Theron in Christian Dior really looks good and you simply cant be a mullet in a good way.

I was hoping Die Hard would be good but didn’t expect to be. The updated slogans for the 5 movies should be: Die Hard, Die Harder, Wouldn’t Die, Just Die, Die Already!


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